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Sightseeing Part I

For some time now I'm already in Lucerne - the most beautiful city in Switzerland - so at least it promises to self-promotion. This can also prove the fact that everyone wants to be other city in the world, sister city of Lucerne. But in the select group does not find Hinz and Kunz intake. The full list of illustrious friends found here.

As the saying goes so beautiful, you do not see the forest for the trees, or in other words, Lucerne is so beautiful that lord levi has not recognized this. Which should be remedied! What would turn to be better than all the tourist attractions for the hard Currency can be admired, to be conducted. That's right. For sightseeing means foot (Lucerne but is the most beautiful city in Switzerland, but unfortunately still quite small, so it also is no such thing as a real sightseeing tour with a full-size vehicle (fully satisfying because Lucerne, only about this small Dampflockzug- dummy has to explore with the chocolate-smeared Rolex tourists from Schweizerhof once on the pier and back) runs) has a radius of about two kilometers.

"Secher ned" I hear already complain that bred Loooozerner. But unfortunately this is also suitably (aka Chapel Bridge Chapel Bridge, Water Tower and the Jesuits (3 of the top four sightseeing recommendations) are now separated by 200 meters)

But that's what I really do not know. The city is beautiful and lord levi part thereof. lord levi wants to experience the beauty of the city! Gone are the days when he is gehastet carelessly around, lowered his hands in the pockets of the view, an attempt to be asked not Kamerabehängten Americans after the "famous bridge.

Tourist activism is from now on the creed!

And so it happened (was it being noted that the idea of \u200b\u200bhow it might be different for an old RAF sympathizers, according to the primacy of the practice was born - the first act, then think) that lord levi visited a beautiful Sunday afternoon in pleasant company loved the Bourbaki Panorama .

The view is in a good 5 minutes admired, will not you listen to the voice that cements from speakers with stories of evil Prussia and brave Swiss soldiers love the neighborhood.

One floor down there's even more ancient nonsense, with the object worth seeing (apart from the donation table, listed on the particular is who which piece panoramic image with 500, - sponsored and has therefore justifiably may be called Meza, even if he has been hit only a piece of heaven, which was probably made by any auxiliary painter and in this context the word arts funding somehow indisposed appears) a first aid box, which my amateur medical knowledge may be excused, require tool comes up with advanced knowledge of its use butcher art.

The checkout girl who was responsible for the passer knew not only what was shown on the lower floor for an art exhibition, as these exhibitions, obvious and crystal clear to anyone, not to the Bourbaki Panorama gehören, und erdreistete sich dann auch noch meine Begleitung als „reifer“ zu bezeichnen.

Die Kosten für diesen touristischen Leckerbissen belaufen sich regulär auf acht Schweizer Franken.

Selbstredend, dass LordLevi – der Student – sich die Ein-Franken-Ermässigung unter den Nagel riss.

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lord levi and pensioners

Vorweg liebe Leser möchte sich LordLevi entschuldigen(das kommt selten vor , also geniesst es). Entschuldigen dafür, dass er sich längere Zeit nicht mehr gemeldet hat. Die Gründe hierfür sind längst genannt und ausgelustscht - Also you need for this kind of excuse not daring, why 'and' why 'shake of the hand, as if you had to explain to the girlfriend, so you get SMS with titles like "Anal pleasure for free".

So much for the obligatory introduction, of our German teachers contributed decisive for marking a work and has therefore permanently immortalized on my memory (Was that too much nerd?)
Anyway .... It is calling Live redesign ( 1) to mind. lord levi the great adventurers and explorers set out, to find a flat to the sweet life of Gammel students to explore. Dies gestaltete sich weit schwieriger als angenommen. Aus unerklärlichen Gründen divergierten die Interessen von LordLevi und dem arbeitsscheuhen Studentenpack so sehr auseinander, dass LordLevi froh war, bereits während der Besichtigung zeitlich das Weite segnen zu können.
Der geneigte Leser, wie ich ihn kenne, von Neugier und haltloser Wundernäsigkeit getrieben, lechzt förmlich nach einer anschaulichen Verdeutlichung der obgenannten Problematik.

LordLevi sass also in der Küche mit drei Mädels, deren WG ein Zimmer(welches ungefähr das Platzangebot eines Fiat Pandas aufwies) zu vergeben hatte. Von den Dreien, war eine ein „Tschääper“, which is German for urner, well - fat sack - and, in fact it was already clear that the room was not an option. Out of sheer courtesy lord levi then sat together but still with the girls, chatted a little and feigned keen interest in domestic banalities of everyday life, when he somehow came to talk to meat. This was a gross error as suddenly see the gloomy faces of the women was. It revealed to him the following:
women: "So yes even meat gaht nöd."

lord levi: "What?"

women: "So I ässed no meat"

lord levi: "Hmmmm"

women: "And my walls all around spread au nid that öpper cooked meat"

lord levi: "What?"

women: "Yes de Gstank the flesh RECOURSE for days i de Cookbook "

lord levi: " OK, but the restaurant villages dejenigi for scho meat ate "

women:" Yes scho, but it would scho better if nid, wäg de animal "

What you as a lover of large beef fillets and lamb rack say to that? lord levi it \u200b\u200bsuddenly in a hurry. The above mentioned conversation is an example of the belief of most WG's represent the lord levi has visited. A little disappointed if the one of the many adversities to be placed in the way he had buried the matter again. A few months later, plagued again by the relentless drive for change, he applied for a listing of two girls. Education students from the beautiful little country over the weekend and always with the parents. assigned to two rooms were the lord of Levi were then also taken.

Those are the facts in the demolition. My new living situation is also somewhat especially because the girls now for the first time to the end of October in Canada abide and lord levi So, the booth on their own. Enough time to mess with all the neighbors and bring the caretaker on the palm. What has also sometimes been implemented successfully, but as lord levi finds, not his fault.
As the living quarters majority, oh, what does the majority, EXCLUSIVELY, pensioners, half - three quarters - and quite senile Kukident users is populated, all of which are plagued follows from paranoia and boredom that which the poor lord levi a welcome change from VIEW and happiness Post crossword puzzles and bring them to pounce on him like vultures, are insane Practices are not uncommon.

My outside parking place, which forces me to my Stuttgart-star of adversity suspend the Swiss weather, is just around the corner. Apart from the fact that no direct way for the 100 meters there and lord levi therefore accessible through front yards creep must, without being in marching around the entire block, is the parking lot away about five yards from the balconies of the white heads that grateful for any excitement, all day hanging behind curtains and see if any who goes to his car, or ENVISAGES his car. About two weeks after I moved, I come on a Friday so against 20 clock by a small sailing with my brother on Lake Zug back as is on my parking Numero 9 is a minibus with Obwaldner indicator.

Ahaaa I think, because moves probably just someone on / off and roll my ship on the Park field number 8 and write, as it should be in the retired district, an admonitory note that the mini bus driver is on my space.

So I go to the van and carefully clamp the note under the windshield wiper so I ankeift someone from behind. I turn around and see an old couple that has a ground floor apartment selected for their habitation. The man is sitting, while the woman stands with both hands onto the site and having said:

de severally private space "

de staht uf mim bus parking lot and therefore I han en gstellt ufs Achti"

"But gaht nid, reserved de way! You dörfed det park nid "

" Yes, but how gseit scho because staht uf mim a parking lot somewhere and I had mis car park yes! "

" But de booked way! Fahred them off their car! "

" the table their parking lot? ", I ask visibly annoyed and aggressive undertone

„Aber de isch reserviert! Sie…“

„Isch das ihre verdammti Parkplatz!???!!!“ , unterbreche ich sie.

„Nei“, meldet sich ihr Mann, dem das irgendwie peinlich ist.

„Dänn gahts sie au verdammt nomal nüt ah!!!!“

„Was hät er gseit?“, fragt die Alte ihren Mann

„Dänn gahts sie au verdammt nomal nüt ah...“, wiederholt ihr Mann meine Worte.

Ich drehe mich weg und sehe noch wie die Alte their arms crossed and shaking his head as she snorted to herself, as opening a window on the first floor.

"Sueched öpper it?", Ask a woman.

"As a staht uf mim parking, they wüssed zuefällig who this manner?" question, I reply.

"That was a de Ma as upper, I saw him schnäll"

"That would be nice" , brawn I with a smile, while the old woman from before visibly offended still shakes his head.
I wait, as the Eingangstüre aufgeht und ein glatzköpfiger, tätowierter Bodybuilder, ungefähr 30, heraus tritt.

„Stahn ich uf dim Parkplatz?“, meint er freundlich.

„Schient so“

„Das isch de Parkplatz vo minere Fründin gsi, die hät de kündet voreme Monat und dänn ischer immer leer gsi drum hanen det ane gstellt, mir züglet ebe jetzt zäme und holed ihri sache“

„Mir ischs ja eigentlich glich gsi, aber die Alt hät gnervt“ , sage ich zu ihm während ich mit dem Kopf Richtung Hochparterrewohnung zeige.

grins The bald head and says in a volume that even deaf pensioners can clearly be heard (who incidentally now all gathered on their balconies and drama to follow, that they so unexpectedly at the end of the week out yet offers)

"Yes Weisch .... They are all assholes anyway because"

"Yes scho" , I give back just as loud.

Cheerful I see the bald head as he umparkiert his van and put my boat on the nine. I leave for about three minutes, the motor running, get out, go to the boot climb back on and still nestle around the glove compartment before I get to mention the eight-cylinder, good humored my shoulder bag and go like this, without once every balcony nice to smile.

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Good morning hell

has now made it even lord levi, definitely to be banished from the face of the youth.
Today 25, tomorrow in the grave, and in between - no, not on what could be omitted!

What to expect:

impotence incontinence

dementia


Happy werding older!

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What goes around, comes around!

... so a day as beautiful as today ...

After me since the beginning of the tournament more open hostilities on the part of the Swiss people to flow towards and grasped at each game in the Klinsi-Eleven to the opposing team party (although it is clear that Germany will win the championship and the Swiss, known opinion-free, always the favorite prove their favor), I am extremely pleased that the failure in red, whose past performances aimed just at the county league, with bowed head must travel home.

celebrate the colorful leaves of Switzerland but the "performance" by Kobi's Luscher and even take out the word "proud" in the mouth.

Hallllooooohooooo? No Elf-Meter sunk and in addition to Ukraine, with Shevchenko has just over a passable € Legionnaire? Those

Ukraine, which was degraded in the first round of Spain 4-0?

The view of things is just here as always a little different.
What remains is the fact that Switzerland should reflect on those sports that you are really Hornussen and wings.

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the butter

It was a beautiful Sunday morning, had breakfast table gedekt ample, when the following conversation occurred:

"I've had enough," said the butter, while she fought back tears.
"Oh come on are already small, what's the matter? "asked the jam compassionate.
" lies Why do I almost always down? "
" Why, why, there are things that are like them ", the jam said something snippy.
" No! The me-not I! Why am I prostitute? "
" Öhhhm ... what? "
" Why is everyone running up and ever so shabby Lioner Camembert put me on it, just so you no me nothing I have to combine with the honey. Just a short time a tete-a-tete with the paprika salami! The whole ... "
" ... Well, that is .. .. ähhm, "stammered the jam.
" ... so there you are speechless, huh! But what may be a Forest Berry Mix expect different!
I'll stay here '! My situation is of greatest concern. But there is still change a lot! Since taking can bet on it! I can already see the headline: '! Butter Strikes Back'. Since you still get away all your fat, ohooo and as I have ... "
" ... what if you please will you do about it? "Interrupts the Walbeer mix," it is now time around otherwise. Your constitution is best suited to seal the bread surface and the rest of us, essential components of a successful breakfast to pave the way! "
" ... .. I think now WESENTLIC H.'s ...", the butter and chopped raged was palpable.

relish I watched the debate and decided to act contrary to the tragedy.
I took a roll, pierced with my knife in the butter and chocked out a good bit.
After the Buttter evenly (each plaster would pale with envy) distributed, had proved to me the question, should I confess myself to charges of promoting prostitution and grant guilty of the butter your solo performance?
Of course not .... I therefore also the first to handle wild berry mix, then the paprika salami, and finally a piece of French soft cheese on top of it ... Enjoy your meal.

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Vote for the haircut crazy ...


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evening at 11

gentle reader

long time ago since I was the last time I cared about you. This also has his reasons, well
let's not exaggerate, the real main reason is that I'll still zugekackt every fucking day of work! Since not much fresh air to be wandering around the idea.
to the change, however - only to, dear people '- Give me work!
No matter what. levi is the lord yes for nothing too bad. Whether something is playing with a lot of leisure time and little authority, or with little amount of work and a lot of dough not really matter. The main thing I do with a nine at the latest 30 Penalty and can use the office space from now on as my personal shit house - and go buy my current employer, so I first had to dismiss all - except one.
Soooooooo, enough of the nagging. I'm going now well-deserved in my knock off!

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about the transience

Now and then there it me to places that I visit do not usually. Not because I was too good (after all, is lord levi for each environment an asset), but because my interests are mostly scattered elsewhere.

So it was that I based on concatenations of life in the I45 in the train arrived. What I was not previously known, the Tatsache, dass das Durchschnittsalter ein gutes Stück unter der magischen 20 lag. Nun, der geneigte Leser darf es wissen, LordLevi wird bald ein viertel Jahrhundert hinter sich haben – und das, Freunde des guten Geschmacks – ist nicht schön! Mir fallen da gerade n+1 Dinge ein, die ich lieber täte, als 25 werden. Aber ich schweife ab.

Was mich beschäftigt ist nicht die Zahl an sich, sondern dieses Gefühl der Vergänglichkeit. In oben benannter Lokalität, tummeln sich also junge Menschen, die nur so strotzen vor sorgloser Lebensfreude und ausgelassener Vitalität. Die Jungs(die in der Unterzahl sind! Wo zur Hölle hab ich so etwas das letzte Mal erlebt?) trinken vorwiegend Dosenbier, sind schlecht gekleidet, tanzen wie wild gewordene Berserker, hängen sich betrunken in den Armen, und diskutieren Rockbands die „voll anti“ sind.

Die Mädels sind erstaunlich selbstbewusst, sehen einem direkt in die Augen, haben beim Griff in den Kleiderschank wesentlich mehr Glück als die Jungs und tanzen den klassischen ich-bin-ein-Huhn-Tanz, der in der Alternativszene äusserst beliebt scheint.

Na jedenfalls steh ich also da, höre mir das Konzert an und sehe den jungen Menschen zu, wie sie, ganz in ihrem Element, frei von Zwängen und Verpflichtungen den Augenblick geniessen. Sich treiben lassen und der Unbekümmertheit hingeben.

Das stimmt mich nachdenklich und ich versuche mich zu erinnern.
Versuche nachzuvollziehen, wie es war, damals als Teeny. Doch es fällt mir schwer. Ich kann mich nicht mehr an die Stimmung erinnern. Mein Gedächtnis projiziert Bilder von Situationen, deren Intensität ich nicht ergründen kann. War ich ausgelassen? Fröhlich? Wild? Befreit? Ich kann es nicht sagen. Schwermut überfällt mich und ein dumpfer Schleier heftet sich wie ein Schatten an den weiteren Verlauf des Abends.

Vielleicht bin ich auch nur Betrunken und einer jener so raren Sentimentalitätsmomente hat mich ergriffen. Kann es wirklich sein, dass man sich nur ein paar Jahre unterscheidet und doch in völlig verschiedenen Welten lebt?
Etwas teilnahmslos stehe ich at the bar, chatting with some old friends and seriously wonder whether I missed my boys. I really savored the freedom of the fool's puberty? I guess I'm this I'm even pretty sure. And yet, somehow leaves a stale aftertaste.

The party's over, old boy!

Before I completely give way I remember my faithful friend Plato, Heraclitus summarize the flow theory tried: "Panta Rhei! Everything flows and nothing stays;. There is not actually being, but only an eternal becoming and Convert "

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I hate ...

... my job!
... the IT industry!
... bad food!
... my work colleagues!
... unshaved girls legs!
... the weather in Switzerland!
... screaming kids!
... one over par!
... walliserdiiitsch!
... all can sleep longer than me!
... the cash from Coop sluts!
foreign ... all cats shitting in my garden!
... texting!
... my gardener, who has oddly always the hand to the eggs when I look out the window!
... Mona Vetsch!
... solar cars!
... my new self!
simply disappear ... if my header!
... waking up with headaches and go to bed with a headache!
... that I have to wait another 40 years in order a sprightly pensioners to be!
... my boss!
... all two-lane highway! Short sleeve shirts

... ... the emptiness in my head after a day at FH!
... when so-called men behave like girls!
... which becomes thicker TV presenters!
... stinking of smoke contemporaries!
... Guide (in Switzerland, also known as Autostöppler)!
... warehousemen!
... when the clock at 14.00 Evian bottle is empty!
... Swiss TV!
... sweaty construction workers!
... Hermann Hesse!
... ÖVM!
... taxes!
... especially readjustment!
... ill-fitting suits!
... permanet Links driver!
... my neighbors!
... songs and Rudi Karell!
... fine!
... warm beer!
... swaying music!
... the Swiss football team!
... bus driver!
... all I have not yet listed, but should be here!

(As far as my dear readers, my mood on a Friday, just before closing time ...) should

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state of emergency

Actually, you know. Should be wiser, should prepare and act accordingly. But year after year it is amazing, and expressed the least, the understatement is par excellence. One is dismayed, and also applied a little, maybe even slightly irritated and many one (including lord levi) Kiesinger wants her emergency laws.

The reader will guess it, speaking of the Carnival (which is written in this country of moronic Fastnächtlern without the 't', ie Carnival). Still, the people may be designated in the Catholic regions of Switzerland, the notabene time was lumped as conservative, narrow-minded and xenophobic (my small stature Anatolian holy warrior friend will confirm this), the fervent desire to dress up, drink and wandering the streets and listen to more than swaying unsteadily, brutal instrumental rape (so-called Guggemusig). Of course jovial without bawling. And because it's dressed up can be so easy, is also dredged baseless gegrabscht and worse, so far that's just humanly possible.

The result of the unbridled exuberance presents nine months later, which can be demonstrated statistically - analogous to the number of abruptly rising side jumps (there should be children of Fastnächtlern of my readers, they had once recommended to critically look at the mirror image and perhaps think about how come the dark complexion may well, but where both parents are more light-skinned)

Not that I'm going misunderstood! I have absolutely nothing against exuberance, I am even a true friend of the exuberance, but I am deeply reluctant, hopping with all the troubled banks and hard to yell with DJ Ötzi Hey Baby. " And when I then see the heads of families who buy dressed as nurses, 16 year old boys beer and for that get a bit of body heat, everything will be under the guise of chummy embrace that belongs to drunken men good form, I think. As can be only so hypocritically go through life? At the root table of the gymnastics club laugh at gay jokes and secretly love the game Brad Pitt on the sandy beach of Bora Bora dream? Kinda sick, right?

Or the otherwise frigid, stuffy old women who enjoy the the hard-toiling husband, not even oral pleasure (let alone correctly ran dry), submit to the next best to the neck and can be in the queue for the snack stand Standing finger.

Where as the so-called morality of the Sauber men who stare at while the rest of the year, the poor lord levi, just because this is a bit eccentric Dressed? Where are they who jammed central Switzerland, which bring joy to their lives mapped shirts expression? Every Saturday her Opel grow and then mow the lawn? Where are they now, the housewives who describe their clothing style as "practical, convenient, discreet"? They search in vain, for it is carnival - as it may be a little bit more colorful. A bit wild, a little more of everything, but keep to the back then the rest of the year. Finally, it is indeed proper and correct, and reserved and would never ever dare simply on the road a little dance, because one is really the case. No, no, it saves on until February, because what would the neighbors think? Really!

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Life: Redesign (1)

Part 1:

It's never too late. Know thyself The journey is the destination. Seize the day. The devil takes the hindmost. God help me.

Poor lord levi, battered by hard work and hard blows (did I mention that I traded my Ingold townspeople V8 against a Stuttgart star (of course, also V8) and I popped after only six weeks against an adit Renault?)) Has his life decided to give a new direction of march. New impetus must be changed or how the girls like to say: "öppis alters". Since I already own an excellent hair cut, so nothing would help, and my shoes are also make them happy, but not quite enough, I am willing to enter new territory. I will do the same Columbus, to follow in his footsteps, walk in his paths, of course in an appropriate urban form itself. I will push into fallow, uncivilized, driven by wild Inhabited, steeped in country:

... drum roll ...
... lord levi intends to move into a flat ... tataaaaaaaa!

The reader will guess it, since I'm obviously not even have guessed.
No, but was indirectly brought on by my ex the most obvious of all the options (you always knew what was good for me;))
Hear, hear, murmured the crowd, but wait - nothing could be further than the good readers in troubled uncertainty waft Do not:
Granted, the old lord levi, speak, lord levi the cynics and fine Pinkel, the egomaniac esthete and detractors would have socially engaged, never to let down, to share with long-haired Ökospinnern the booth and because of endangered animals in eastern Tibet to put candles on the window sill.
But the new lord levi not upgraded. It's all over the times of the nasty comments and defamation! Enough of the shameful words and affection of posturing. Once again, let the world see that the wind changes.
Why this sudden change of heart? I do not know. And on closer inspection plays no role, because as the saying goes, who is not sleeping 'or something like that. Mir is faaaad Sun 'd Say the Viennese. Maybe it's that. (Other proposals, which deal with the poor lord levi can be gladly accepted).

course I am aware that a redevelopment project of this magnitude is not without one or the other check is done. And of course there is the possibility that the new lord levi will reoffend, shamelessly opened the hunt in the good Moritz, with narrow-minded colleagues, the board game - known from TV and radio - Keyboard-meets-rectum plays, special taxes for obese calls that dwarf the cafeteria checkout girl (the one with the porn face) gets to hear what lord levi likes about her, including the oversized ... I digress.

Either way, it will change a lot (by the way the layout of this site, because ultimately has Vere extracting a header for me be made and which is also installed, as promised, honest, I swear)

Well , the shock runs deep and it rolls her eyes in disbelief, but the sails are set. Now it's course to India (for those who have mourned the loss of my star and darum die erste Passage nur fragmentarisch erfassten konnten…Kolumbus wollte da auch schon hin)

Man darf also gespannt sein, doch soviel sei vorweg verraten...der nächste Teil der Lord’schen Metamorphose, spielt in den WG’s die es zu besichtigen gilt...